Reflections on a week in London
Themes from my conversations, the power of art and changes in me.
Hello everyone!
I’m writing to you after a great week away in London. I was after some quality time with friends, clients and collaborators, and a top-up of big city energy. My husband and I left London for Lisbon in 2019, after the best part of a decade, for an opportunity to build a different kind of life. We’re really happy here in Portugal but it’s been quite an adjustment on many fronts. I’ve changed so much since then and these shifts always come into focus when I’m back in London, comparing who I am now in familiar places with who I was then. I’m realising how important these trips are for someone like me who works remotely, and I plan to take them more regularly. It’s been non-stop so this week’s installment is a recap of what I’ve been up to and what I’ve been thinking about.
My base for the week was King’s Cross which is interesting from a system change perspective. Queen Boudicca’s final resting place is believed to be underneath Platform nine at Kings Cross Station, after she led a failed uprising against the conquering forces of the Roman Empire in AD 60 or 61. It was also the site of The Metropolitan Railway, the world’s first underground railway which was opened in the late 1800s, and it played a key role connecting London to major industrial cities in the north of England. These days King’s Cross is a really impressive model of constructive conservation that captures the special quality of London as it’s grown over the centuries. It’s also the focal point for one of the greatest knowledge clusters anywhere in the world. Within a few hundred metres you can find knowledge resources ranging from the world’s earliest books and manuscripts to the latest fashion and creative designs, cutting-edge tech and medical research. I’m a geographer at heart so I love to geek out on this stuff!
My week in numbers
65,000 steps
10 catch ups with friends and clients
2 meetings with people helping me to grow my business
2 art exhibitions
2 football matches (I’m a proud Arsenal fan)
2 babies
1 cat
Four themes from my conversations
The system changers I hung out with this week work in human rights, venture capital, community building, leadership and culture, AI research, love and relationship coaching, and fintech. All of them are really passionate about creating positive, systemic change in their respective fields and, despite working in such different sectors and in very different ways, there strong common themes in our conversations.
Leadership
Everyone spoke to the challenges of leading change which is counter-cultural, how hard it can be to maintain optimism and confidence in a new way of doing things when you’re met with scepticism and push-back. A couple of people touched on how common it is for change-makers to be motivated by a personal connection to their mission which is rooted in trauma. We talked about what it takes to lead change with peace and grace in these circumstances, and how we can support people with their wellbeing and emotional regulation (more on that another time). A few people were grappling with the challenges of leading and managing others, supporting others in their leadership and managing up. We discussed the importance of values alignment, communication skills and emotional intelligence and how to help teams grow together though dedicated time for reflection, feedback, and training.
Wellbeing
Perhaps the end-of-year timing skewed this somewhat, but everyone talked about needing to look after themselves more, especially with regards to taking rest, reducing workload and being adaptable to big changes happening in their lives. We talked about the art of boundary setting (an extremely common theme in my coaching work) and prioritising health. We also talked about the hidden work of caring for our health - seeing medical professionals regularly enough, checking things out that don’t feel right, testing and tracking different solutions - and how common it is for people to neglect themselves whilst working hard to support others. I shared my story of finding a ground-breaking physio clinic which solved my chronic migraine problem this year (more on that another time).
Parenthood
I met two beautiful new babies of friends this week and so spent some time talking with them about transitions into parenthood and how these changes influence our lives and identities. One friend gave me her spare copy of Matresence: On the Metamorphosis of Pregnancy, Childbirth and Motherhood, a radical new examination of the transition into motherhood and how it affects the mind, brain and body. My conversations with mothers reminded me of the new organisation Branch which is transforming how women return to work after maternity leave. I also caught up with Clementine Prendergast who’s building Raise, a new fintech startup helping people to raise the funds needed to start a family. In related news, Pregnant Then Screwed is hiring a Head of Operations. The way we think about and support parenthood is clearly changing and it was really uplifting to explore.
Spirituality
This is a half-formed thought but I wanted to share it with you anyway. I’m building a coaching methodology and a library of content here on Substack which aim to help system changers thrive in all areas of life. I’m becoming really interested in spirituality as part of this mix and I’ve spotted a trend in recent months of clients and new friends being really interested in Buddhism and Buddhist ways of life. Increasingly, my work is inspired by people like Joana Macy, PhD, teacher, author and scholar of Buddhism, systems thinking and deep ecology. I’m currently reading her book World as Lover World as Self and can see that I have a huge amount to learn from her. I’ve also noticed that lots of my clients share an interest in dance. At first this seemed like a coincidence but as I’ve looked into it I’ve learned that dancing is one of our most powerful ways of communicating that which can’t be expressed with words. And I imagine that people who dance and appreciate dance must be quite in tune with their bodies and the insight that lives there. Two highly powerful skills for system changers!
The power of art
I always try to catch some art exhibitions when I’m in London. This time I went to see Marina Abramović at the Royal Academy of Arts. An art world icon and a performance art pioneer, Abramović has captivated audiences by pushing the limits of her body and mind for the past 50 years. She’s consistently tested the limits of her own physical and mental endurance in her work, subjecting herself to exhaustion, pain and even the possibility of death. This exhibition presents key moments from her career through sculpture, video, installation and performance. I was surprised (but also not really) to learn that Abramović is the first woman to be given a solo retrospective at the RA in their 255-year history. I loved a piece called Portal which was quite intense to walk through!
I also went to see Women in Revolt! Art and Activism in the UK 1970-1990 at Tate Britain. The first of its kind, this exhibition is a wide-ranging exploration of feminist art by over 100 women artists working in the UK. It shines a spotlight on how networks of women used radical ideas and methods to make an invaluable contribution to British culture. Their art helped fuel the women’s liberation movement during a period of significant social, economic and political change. The most moving part for me was ‘Women & Work: A Document on the Division of Labour in Industry 1973-75’ by Margaret Harrison, Kay Hunt and Mary Kelly which is a survey and analysis of women’s labour at a factory. The artwork was produced during the implementation of the Equal Pay Act which was passed in 1970. The piece included women’s daily schedules capturing extremely long days shouldering all responsibility for domestic labour in their households and highly physical part time jobs. It made me think of Claudia Goldin’s groundbreaking research advancing our understanding of women’s labour market outcomes which this year earned her a Nobel Prize in Economics, and how long women have been fighting for equality.
Changes in me
One of my meetings was with my website design agency. I briefed them on some changes I want to make to my site to make the messaging and layout clearer. It was really encouraging to realise how far I’ve come since we made version one, and how much I’ve learned about my target customer and how to communicate with them since I started coaching. The second meeting was a very helpful coaching session with
who writes a Substack exploring mental health recovery, and another providing expert guidance on how to grow a Substack. I was excited to speak to her about my plans for this publication, especially as she’s a system changer in the mental health space. We talked about how I can make my offering clearer and more compelling for you, the different opportunities for me to introduce a paid subscription, and how I can think about growth and publicity. It was really fun and encouraging so I signed up for another three sessions. Can’t wait to share more on this soon. In both meetings I was far less precious about my brand and my ideas compared to when I started out, and this felt like a good bit of growth to celebrate!Perhaps my biggest takeaway from the trip was how different I felt during a busy week in London, compared to when I lived there in my 20s. In the last few years I’ve worked really hard on my anxiety, I’ve stopped rushing, comparing and striving, and I’m much less in my head these days. Spending time in very familiar parts of town packed with memories, I felt like a totally different person. I had time and energy for little moments of connection with strangers, I was more present with myself and the people I was there to see. I felt really grateful and proud of myself for how far I’ve come since we made the leap.
Until next time!
Gen
p.s. I’m thinking about a regular online meetup for subcribers, let me know in the comments if you’re keen!
We moved to London a year ago, so please let me know when you’re back. Would *love* to catch up!
Loved reading your reflections Gen and such a gift to see you!! ❤️❤️